Friday, February 29, 2008

Putting Sense

I been tiptoeing my way here. And thinking that I should be putting sense in my life. “Putting Sense” what is it? I can't remember where or how I get these words. Has these phrase made me wiser to even think of it. Or just some presuming acquired wisdom happen to across by. Or maybe out of my waiting.

For the longest time, I been staring through my window. I see movements, people choosing direction & driving to it. And sometimes, someone even stopped by and drag me out from my self-imposed cell. And occasionally, I allowed them.

There, I was having my child eye, Seeing, feeling & wondering...what they want me to see? My inner me asking... "Should I see what they want me to see, or feel what they felt or just stop wondering and be drag by their flow. "

Then, I'm back on my window. Look out to put sense to all these. My eyes are tired.... I shut it down. It jolt me. I see images of people I cared. A smile say it all. There's no used to putting sense. Because there, they are my SENSE. I have them with me all this time.

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Wordless Wednesday

I've chosen this as my Wordless Wednesday..

for I don't only see a sculpted woman in granite

but a statue of a woman becoming a deity.

On my own thinking,

All women have the essences of

a goddess of fertility.

Guiding as Juno... Devoted as Isis... Protective as Artemis

and having

“Unconditional Love”

like Hestia.

D'man with his superlatives

Superlatives : toujours(always),jamais(never), tout le temps(all the time), aucun(e)(nothing), vraiment(very) and more... These are some of his word amplifications, always attached on his opinions. Which for me, it's a trigger to illuminate my facial lines. Nothing sightly about it. I assure you.

Another issue between this wrecked couple is how some adverbs of frequency have been misused or misplaced in their phrases. D'man of this shack just love using them. At first, I thought he was just practicing his English.. a la Word Power baga.

Lately, I myself have been acquiring the french equivalent of it. And hearing him using the french one.It can't be associated as a word power drills any longer. For some time now, these practices are getting off hand. And it tickles my nasal to exhaust flame.

I 've always thought, he's the accurate one between the two of us. A mathematical man. Now all, i can hear are exaggerations to the highest level (ting..ting..ting). And worst, he has the believing tone along with it. How in heaven's name, I could argue with an upright nose? You tell?!

But there are times that I could actually give a heart-filled laugh when he's on his attacks of "doomsday narration" mode. how it amused me as a listener. But not when my humor abandons me due to lack of sleep.

Even living together for many years. Acceptance of ways still on process. There, I beg that you dont think i'm bashing him. I'm just stating that we have some probs or differences like normal couples, shallow or wacky it may sound. This states that we are not always inside our rosy blanket.

Anyway, I should have just charged it to cultural differences or something.. and get a decent sleep.

Thursday, February 21, 2008

My white nights...

Its been weeks having my attacks (insomnia).To a point that i voluntary gave-up my bed, for the sake of the Man of the house to have decent sleep. Or else, this shack will have two grumpy semi-adult brains running it. No good at all!

In my newly acquired sleeping quarter which I happily (in some occasion) shared with my adopted Sally. We're bonding great from watching TV and munching anything edible... to pass on our White Nights.

Though sometimes, I felt that she abused me by giving me those pleading looks to have my last slice of cheese. Darn, how I hate when I fell for it. Watching her nibbling my last piece of roquefort and finishing it with a lick(that did me!!)...& then throwing me the looks of “ Can you fetch us more yummies ,pls.” The heck! if i'll do it.

Childishly i've turned off the screen. She took the queue that I'm in a bad mood. And her as always would marched gracefully out of my sight with the air of “AS if I care.” Still, time to time making me notice that she isn't asleep and waiting for what she ask.

Oh non!! This mama is a hard ball,too. Off i go, had a feast with my eyes in Dhanggit's kitchen & Creampuff in Venice... From these bloggers, I scrolled down from their links of food lovers. "Yummy, now I can slumber in my couch."

PS: Sorry with the typo or grammar error, still in the moon.

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

BEWARE what you asked for

I can't help not sharing this. This line just really have a deeper meaning to my Eldest son. Let me break our confidentiality as mom to son.

Lets go back 4 yrs ago. He was in 5eme about to enter the adolescence age. Physical changing is on progress and terms of height and hairs.

And Him as an Asian or just in his genes had some little late on that growth. The year before that, he doesn't really mind, him different from others. It just, when he keeps on seeing in their locker room. How his peers having some baby mustache & bushes down their belly button. And the talks of using razor & cream... where he can't reliates.Tick him off.

These must be really bothering him a lot to confine to me. I told him that it will come & not to worry. Then he told me "mais(but) non, I keep on checking everywhere..... my arms, my legs, & nada in you know where. but I dont see them!" At first, I thought of giving him cookies to calm him down. [ Hey, its my first time dealing Ado.] I didn't. I took cookies for both of us and lifting his arm. Pointing to those microscopic hairs, I see. Told him " just wait, it will be darken soon."

After the pep talks. He's a bit calmer. But time to time... hearing him saying it loudly. How he felt bad. When girls told he shaves his legs or how his best friend caressing & saying “wow, your much softer than my girl friend.” Those makes him insecure about himself. I'm finding it hard not to laugh & cry at the same time. Coz i know that there's no recipe, i could find and cook to have those hairs appear. He keeps on hoping & praying to have hairs.

Then, 2 years passed, God finally grant his wishes. He's taller than me now. Which he brags often as he could. And YES!!! the hairs too... they are darker , longer & more. And the mustaches(oh, boy!).. yeah, he has some baby ones ( not much).Enough for him to enjoy having a “shaving time” to his heart content. You wanna know about the bushes, right? YES, it was an event to this household. The first visible strand was celebrated & rejoiced. And that was my last peek on him.

But the rest of hairs were badly distributed...How? Imagine your knees got mustache...& the rest of your legs & arms are's that to you? It becomes a laughing ground to us.(Don't worry, he also see the humour of it.)

Now as in NOW, he wants me to have a peek on his behind.( I know, it's disturbing...)I didn't allowed him to strip off, it's enough to hear his woes about it.(it also concerns hair misplaced)

Beware what you asked for,K?! My last line to him before escaping to the kitchen.

Gray can be grace...

This time of year..gray sky lurking in my horizon as often as I can count. It makes me a bit depressed (Ok, a lot) from time to time. How this shade can play on my emotion. In some stage, I see Gray is equal to Depression.

Through, living here for 6 yrs have taught me... What is depression. How it sucks the life out of you and the most important of all,To Know when not to lingers to your grayish(depressing) mood. Like I would have done before. No good would this feeling brings you. I tell you.

Now, I 'm learning how to use gray in a positive way . As a fusion to see what is significant in my life. It gives me the time to slow my pace to review my deeds....And more, it helps me to illuminate the things I ought to see best.

Monday, February 18, 2008

A la Mode de Mardi Gras

My little Missy was so hyper arriving from School. I can hardly make up what she was stuttering about. All I could hear was fluctuating tone of excitement.I started frowning to a bouncing kid in front of me. It made her calm in seconds.

She started back from “Mama il faut que, je m'habille (mumbling after.....) comme à Borcéliande, D'accord? ( mama I must in Borcéliande,ok?) And me, magnifying effortlessly my facial line being asked Où est-elle,mama?(where is it mama?)I stupidly asking Where's what?

Then i got slapped by “Don't you speak French, mama?” With strong French accent...Uh, that hurts!!! I was about to mimick her and gearing for the girlish fight. Then comes the Kuya.(elder brother)explaining it all to me. I finally understand what was the yackety-yak about.

Anyway, with all these ramblings. She just wanted to tell me that they should be in deguisement (costume) & they are allowed to have make-ups tomorrow for Fat Tuesday. Seeing her glowing with the prospect of being a medieval princess for a day. My cranky mood switch off.

Of course, being a mama i tried to explain what is Mardi Gras (to a nearly 6 yrs. old). And finding out that it will not give any fruit at all. The only thing that makes her stay hearing my "because of this ..because of that" is to know, if i'll put her my lipstick. Talking about fast growth.

In any how, It reminds me of our festivals back home in Philippines. They are sometimes being conotated as Mardi Gras. How I wish, my kids would see them...parading in colorful costumes, painted faces, masked, powerful drumbeat with ingenuous dance.

Like...The Ati-atihan in Kalibo,Aklan... Sinulog in Cebu... Masskara Festival in Bacolod... Dinanghay in Iloilo. Most of this feast falls under the month of January, except for Masskara in October. Wow, it makes me smile.Nothing beats home.

The Ruins of Tonquédec (TONKEDEG)

While I'm waiting for some positive response from my sole prospective employer. I was indulging myself looking through my snapshots. Crossing with.....

"Château de Tonquédec"

In breton, Its Tonkedeg. The Château dominates the valley of Léguer, west side of Côte d'Armor in Bretagne region. The Origin:

"Viscount Prigent, the last known Viscount of Tonquedec, marries his eldest daughter to Geslin de Coetmen. Together the two begin the story of Tonquedec’s Lords.

Geslin de Coëtmen, belongs to the family of the Dukes of Penthievre, a younger line of the Sovereigns of independent Brittany, and is the owner of Coetmen Castle.

13th to 14th Centuries: From the 13th to the end of the 14th centuries the Viscounts of Tonquedec and Coëtmen are at the crusades."

[These coloured captions were taken from a couple, who happens to have more information about Tonquédec historical lines. "Thank you for filling up my curiosity and enriching my knowledge about Bretagne." In return, I've taken the liberty to promote their site.please click on the link. ]

I vividly recall, how wonderful it made me feel touching those stones.It has proudly stood still all this time. And even with moss, they seems more beautiful to me, rather than imagining it in its stage of glory. This ruin... makes me see more than I could see in my life time. Histories have been written in every block of stones, it carries. Some historian may defer, who am I to argue...

"All i know, I can't put words to how i feel about this place...for I admire how it stood by the time ."

Sunday, February 17, 2008

Sunday morning is such a drag

Waking up on Sunday like some school day is not a personal choice. It has been forcefully imposed by my kids. I wish, I could reprogram my little patrols(kids) to indulge themselves to stay in their beds until brunch time and sleeping like some angels. To avoid hearing them fighting over the remote control and “who's-turn-who” to watch or pick channel. Worst of all, hearing Sponge Bob sharing his wit.

& Me, dreaming to have time to play “tag of war” with blanket, after pulling out my white flag , then resigning by curling-up with hubby to warm me. (Nothing kinky thought please, Sunday morning,k. )

Unfortunately, this mama doesn't have this luxury. Forced to be awake & dressed with an apron to start a day. Down we go,Whisking some flours & eggs.. for pancakes, Got to leave the coffee making to hubby (self reminder) . He's not fun with my coffee, often tells me, it makes his nerve shaky. Too strong.

I personally loves it that way. Feeling that a big jolt is much needed to run this household. Or I 'll be outwitted by my télétubbies. Anyway, they still find a way how to outsmart me. And they do it so well. I know,This is something hard to swallow & ego bruising for mamas. Here my unsolicited tips.. laugh about it, don't take it personal and remember, you're not alone. And you may put me on your list. Certified wrecked Maman.

Darn, wish to be in bed still... rather then feel sorry later on, reading these blahblahs... pardon na lang.

Big Persona @ play?!

Here me, playing my dear wifey role, Watching and hearing the recaps of news about the BIG PERSONA in France & from hubby twitting mood about him.

Can't help thinking that, how the Big-tiny (you know who,right?) so dynamically playing with his newly acquired wand . To me, he seems loving it. Wagging and dropping some new spells in different sectors, & poor operators (law enforcers) getting confused how to interject the new magical spell given.
Wondering me... Is he boldly playing god? Reviving historical pains to 10 yr. old eyes. What good does it brings to them (children)? I don't know.

Or he's still on the transition of a newlywed, So Obliging and Giving. He might have felt the needs to bring Roses (offerings) to every doors, he knocks ... Or is he merely a loud thinker? Perhaps, people should have wait a lot longer before printing and pinning it on for public eye.
And you, What do you think?

Friday, February 15, 2008

Friday should never be confusing

Normally, i should be running up & down with rag & broom in hand. After setting on all the mechanical helps ( laundry & dish washer, dyer & etc... ) working for me. Can't help to THANK those INVENTORS making my life easier." Praise you people. "
If some inventors happen to lost their way here, " Can you please invent some MAGIC WAND." Pretty sure, I can handle the pointing thing, that's where I'm good at.
Oh non, need to do the ironing... doing grocery list...and pack for my little boy, while thinking what plate should i put on our table tonight.. Well, should say that i did the switching " ON " and cleaning the salon.

Guys, i'm allowing you to image me with an APRON but omit the lacey thing on my head, please. Stepford Wives persona? Not bad, but to be more realistic, don't envision me the OVER-indulging (wink) wifey and gifted with proud bumpers and humps. Tell you, don't mind having them at all.
Anyway, i should be doing those to prepare my weekend. So that, Monday won't be so miserable first start of the week. Having 3 monsters who are cuties when asleep. Sometimes, these monsters becomes 4 (sorry, lovey).

Instead, Here I am with my Ltop,writing & figuring how to launch my blog into the eworld. Adding those funny gadgets.. Just amazing. When i did things right, but most of the time, spend on grinding my teeth out of frustration. I ended up asking, " Where do i go from here? "

Blog for dummies, should be dummier ...for my sake. Hubby & friends knew, that I'm NO comprendo with computer. Lately, the copy & paste become my fave.

I got to go....SEEing the list? They are adding up.

Thursday, February 14, 2008

To Hubby,

You're my SPICES.

Without YOU,I'm Bland.

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Letting go, your BUDDY.

Another day to start. Hubby & kids are out & me staring at my "need to do" list. Telling that, I should clean our bureau preparing it for a facial-lift. Almost raced to the second floor with a coffee mug & tobacco in hand. Stunned, what lays on a 5 m² room.

Asking myself, why did I CALL this a bureau ? Ooh, coz it got a 2 processors with one monitor, printer, office table with a pitiful chair & bunch of files clattered. Other than that…nothing more, Just… junks, boxes, a cabinet with a broken handle, some travel souvenirs and funny photos of my kids hanging on the wall with a draft of late 60's wallpaper, inherited from it's former owner. If it's floral. I won't mind, Got a heart of a hippy.

Now, summoning the courage to get me started. It's nowhere to be found. Slowly, letting myself be seated, rolling my tobacco to calm me down. Well, a minute to check my email won't hurt. Another eye popping. Sh.., am I that lazy?
Let's not answer that one. "Anyway, got loads to do." Only justification i could come up. I continued scrolling down, away from special offer, to see if someone loves me enough to write me. Slowly.... slowly..... and freeze…. then a helicopter sound.

"PC is thinking." hubby would normally say. So, what else to do but wait. Minutes pass and go....pass and go... What's more? Hearing, my old buddy Computer working its way with more intense buzzing sound this time.And me getting annoyed seeing a Sign of aging just screaming.
Pressing question is back. Weighing hard, Should I let it go?
Imagination works… My best buddy being crashed & compacted with some other unwanted PC. Conscience says,
"Cruel! Where's your heart, B? You were buddies since you've stepped on this soil."

Thinking what can be done. Even, hubby can't doctored it. The Sound is almost deafening. Then, silence falls.....tic... tac...tic...tac... can't make up my mind. Refuse to see that..
My BUDDY is gone.

Monday, February 11, 2008

Adornment reflects you?

Adornments are so many in forms, arts, colors and…. are not just making someone stunning or fashionable.
It’s a fragment of unstated self-reflection as an individual, within cultural background, beliefs, social status and more…
Also it shows individual’s adaptation of something new that pleases personal taste. Consider as growth.
It also helps how to project emotion. We often see people metamorphosing through adornments. Showing a part of our personality on how we adorn ourselves.
However, it doesn’t fully defines a person.

Gifted with having vision, this adornment can be tricky… it could put someone particular category personalized by the looker.

Anyway, what matters most is, Are you happy what you’re wearing now? If yes, then flaunt it.

Fingerpicking, picks my nerves

To those who doesn’t know fingerpicking, it’s a technique for playing some stringed instruments using fingertips or fingernails instead of a pick (plectrum). It creates new sound… highlighting notes & so on. You must be wondering why praise something that picks my nerve. So contradicting!
Tell you what. A bit of hubby’s other love. His guitar. A passion that I should be supportive, but no, I’m not. Though, I’ve given a hand to earn a bit passion like his. Yet, I’m having difficulties hearing it every time his at home. Playing his favorite guitarist so loud just irks me. Restoring on locking myself in my domain which is kitchen. Still, it’s high pitch find its way piercing my eardrums. Even brain humming my mantra doesn’t work. Plus, seating in a hard stool, just crack me more. Self-imposed detention, won’t recommend it. Gotto think fast before this becomes an issue once again.
Putting on my thinking cap.(think...think...) Voila, a headphone! Next level will be how to suggest it without triggering sensitive spot or would it be wise to give it as valentine present? What a romantic gist.( i know, i know... ) Evoking an undesirable howling in Valentine’s Day makes it's bloody red.

Jotting this down… is not meant to paint black on both of us. Merely showing that even we share great love to one another, doesn’t mean that, we favor the same thing. Individual living together have to learn to accept or mend its differences.

Ps: to those who love Fingerpicking check this kid named Sungha Jung from South Korea. He is amazing.( Not in payroll,just stating,k? ) He deserved to be Known in his craft.

Saturday, February 9, 2008

Want some Lollipop

Can’t say that I’m engrossed with political issue here. Handling a profound discussion on this subject shouldn’t be cast on my direction. Yet, with little glimpse of news and as an audience from hubby & his family analyzing current events, sometimes hearing heated debates. My unsolicited speculation forms that, the new President addresses the people like some children,

pacifying them with lollipop to stop from whining. Soothing effect follows…. Then, the lollipop will be revoke. Does HE (president) see them in diaper? I wonder...

And for the video, Thank you so much, POMARETTO.

Friday, February 8, 2008

First Plunge

It is normally so simple to plunge in. Yet, when we took time weighing our moves... its pros and cons, and then, it become so impossible to dive in. I speak about how I have sheltered my life here in France. I took time to acclimate. Not even knowing that by taking those times, I have lost a part of me. My nerve and self-esteem seems in the past now. There, I affirmed. The deafening impact of these written thoughts awakens me. What‘s left to do? Take the first plunge!

[Thought of this photo, i took from "ABBEYE DE BEAUPORT" in Paimpol, Bretagne 3 yrs. ago. Should revisit it,to see the progress of its restoration.]